The Ayahuasca journey is often described as transformative, but to say it has merely “changed” me would be an understatement.
I have been on the path with Ayahuasca for over three years now, and the experience has revolutionized my understanding of myself and the world around me. For some, three years of drinking Ayahuasca may seem like a considerable amount of time, while for others, it may appear rather brief. Either way, the individual I was when I first encountered Ayahuasca and the person I have become are worlds apart.
This path has offered me exponential growth in understanding, emotional depth, and maturity—almost like traveling on an ‘autobahn' towards personal and spiritual development.
In this blog post, I want to offer some of the insights that Ayahuasca has taught me and these teachings have profoundly affected my life.
So, whether you are a skeptic, a curious soul, or a seasoned Ayahuasca veteran, I invite you to explore these insights, as they may offer you a new perspective on mysterious plant medicine and its transformative power.
- Ayahuasca has helped me to become my own best friend, quiet down the inner critic, accepting and forgiving myself.
- The person you become in the process is the most important. The more I grow, the more authentic and loving I am, the more of an impact I have.
- Connecting to my intuition, letting go of constant overthinking and being more in my body.
Table of Contents
Lesson #1: I Am Not My Thoughts or Patterns: The Awakening
I remember vividly one of my earliest experiences with Ayahuasca, a night that shifted my understanding of my own identity. For much of my life, I had been trapped in a labyrinth of my own thoughts, believing that these thought patterns defined who I was.
That intense night, with various emotional revelations, I found myself face to face with a profound truth: I am not my thoughts or patterns.
It was as if I had been granted access to a control room inside my own mind, a place where I could observe my thoughts as separate entities, independent from my true self. I understood that I had been subscribing to these patterns and beliefs, but they were not an intrinsic part of me.
The most empowering aspect of this revelation was recognizing my ability to change these patterns. I was not doomed to be a slave to my own mind; instead, I had the choice and the power to reshape my thoughts, behaviors, and by extension, my reality.
This realization has set me on a path to consciously observing my thoughts and questioning their validity, allowing me to gradually untangle the web of mental constructs that had held me captive for so long.
Lesson #2 Love: The Ultimate Lesson from Ayahuasca
Love — the most profound of human emotions, yet often something far away. Ayahuasca introduced me to love in its purest form—having unconditional love flow through my whole body.
During one of my Ayahuasca ceremonies, I was enveloped in an ineffable sense of love, so pure and boundless that words can hardly do it justice. It was a love that expanded beyond the limitations of human relationships, transcending all categories and labels.
But what struck me most was the revelation of love towards myself and the love between my mom and me.
I felt my mother's unconditional love for me that had always been there.
This experience had a substantial impact on my self-love and self-confidence. It was as if Ayahuasca held up a mirror, reflecting not just my face, but my soul, showing me that I am deserving of love, from others and most importantly, from myself. This realization has empowered me to be more compassionate, not only towards others but in the way I treat myself.
Lesson #3: Positive Self-Talk: Becoming My Own Best Friend
We often hear that we should be our own biggest supporters, but turning that into reality isn't always easy. I used to be my own worst critic, constantly dissecting my actions and thoughts, searching for problems to fix. While this kind of scrutiny can drive improvement, it's also mentally exhausting.
I can not point this shift to a particular ceremony. In a way I wasn’t even aware of it until I had a conversation with a friend about self – talk and noticed how deeply I have changed in that regard.
Now, the way I communicate with myself is distinctly different and more uplifting. It's like having a supportive companion with me at all times, reminding me of my worth and cheering me on as I face life's challenges. The change is permanent, and it has made an enormous difference in my daily life—refreshing my mental state and enhancing my overall well-being.
Lesson #4: Forgiving and Accepting Myself
Self-judgment and resentment have long been companions of mine. From lamenting past mistakes to feeling inadequate compared to others, I was ensnared in a cycle of self-criticism.
I questioned why life's challenges seemed to be so much easier for everyone else while I struggled to keep pace. These intrusive thoughts were draining, holding me back from truly enjoying life and appreciating my unique journey.
During a particularly impactful Ayahuasca ceremony, I experienced a profound shift. It was as though the self-judgment had lifted, and I could see myself for what I really am—a human being, imperfect but always growing. In that moment, I learned to forgive myself, especially the younger version of me who simply did the best he could with what he knew at the time.
Realizing that my past mistakes were not indictments of my character but rather stepping stones in my growth was liberating. I fully accepted myself, flaws and all, and this acceptance spread like a balm over the old wounds of resentment and inadequacy. I could move forward with a sense of compassion for myself that I had never felt before. This shift helped me reach a deep level of peace within myself.
Lesson #5: Becoming More Authentic:
For much of my life, I lived behind a mask, always trying to be the person I thought others wanted me to see. Whether it was saying what I believed would elicit approval or doing things aimed at getting a specific reaction, I was not living authentically. I was performing a role, based on my perception of what others expected of me.
This was one of my first lessons with Ayahuasca. I realized that by wearing a mask, I was not only denying my true self but also stopping genuine connections with others.
Of course, integrating this lesson into everyday life wasn't easy or immediate. Understanding it in the state of a ceremony is one thing; living it out in the real world is quite another.
Initially, rejection hurt more because it felt like a rejection of my true self, not just a character I was playing. However, the more I practiced authenticity, the more I found that the people who really mattered to me—those who valued me for who I am—came into clearer focus.
Taking off the mask was liberating but also challenging. It made me more vulnerable, yet this vulnerability was the pathway to genuine relationships and self-assurance. I've come to realize that the only approval I truly need is my own, and the relationships I've cultivated as my authentic self are far richer and more fulfilling than any I had while living behind a mask.
Must read blog: Ayahuasca Integration – How to maintain the magic of Ayahuasca
Lesson #6 Stronger Boundaries: Learning to Say No
For much of my life, I operated on a people-pleaser mode. I often said yes when I really wanted to say no, afraid to upset anyone or face confrontation. The problem with this approach was that, while trying to make everyone else happy, I was continually saying no to myself and my own needs.
My journey with Ayahuasca helped me realize the importance of setting healthy boundaries. It's more than just saying no; it's about establishing what I stand for, what I will tolerate, and how I want to be treated. It was a hard lesson, but an incredibly freeing one. I understood that my boundaries are a reflection of my self-worth and self-love.
In a way I teach people how to treat me through the boundaries I set. If I continuously compromise my needs for the comfort of others, I send the message that my needs are not important. On the flip side, when I assertively communicate my boundaries, I send a clear message that I respect myself enough to advocate for my own well-being.
It requires courage, especially at first. But the more I've practiced this, the clearer expectation and communication has become.
Lesson #7: Confrontation with Death
Few things shake you to your core like a confrontation with death. During my Ayahuasca journey, I've had multiple experiences that brought me face-to-face with my own mortality.
These encounters were intense and unsettling, but they served as unparalleled teachers. The awareness that my time on Earth is limited catapulted me out of my day-to-day complacency, propelling me to reevaluate my priorities and my life's direction.
These experiences prompted me to question the way I had been living. Was I merely going through the motions? Was I living in a way that was truly aligned with my values? These confrontations with death forced me to ponder what I truly want from life and the kind of impact I wish to leave behind.
It shifted my focus from worries to what genuinely matters and how I want to be living my life.
Lesson #8 Becoming More Secretive: The Power of Silent Manifestation
In indigenous traditions, the messages you receive from Ayahuasca are seen as secrets—sacred wisdom meant only for you. Initially, this idea seemed foreign to me, especially coming from a culture that often encourages us to share our experiences openly, looking for feedback or seeking advice.
However, as I went deeper into my path with Ayahuasca, I began to appreciate the power of discretion.
What I've found is that there's a certain energy in keeping things close to your chest. In the modern world, there's often an impulse to share our dreams and plans with everyone, perhaps thinking that doing so will help bring them into reality. Yet, I've discovered that the opposite can be true. The more I spoke about my plans or ideas (especially in the past, but still true today), the less likely they were to come to fruition. It was as if the act of talking about them, also required energy which was needed to manifest them.
On the other hand, when I kept my plans to myself, nurturing them in the private garden of my thoughts and intentions, they seemed to flourish and materialize more easily. It's almost as if by not sharing them, I was able to keep the energy concentrated, giving my ideas the space and the power they needed to turn into reality.
In many ways, this shift towards becoming more secretive was not just a change in behavior but a change in mindset. It taught me the value of keeping things to myself and the power that can be harnessed by keeping certain things personal.
Lesson #9 Connecting to My Intuition: The Inner Compass
Another invaluable gift that my path with Ayahuasca has helped me develop is a deeper connection to my intuition. I used to be overwhelmed with external opinions, societal expectations, and my own conflicting thoughts. But Ayahuasca helped me tune into that subtle, inner voice—the wisdom that has always been there but was often ignored or overshadowed.
Learning to listen to my intuition has been like developing a new sense. Whether it's about making career decisions, choosing relationships, or collaborating on projects, this inner compass has consistently guided me towards choices that resonate with my true self. The more I've trusted this instinctual guidance, the more accurate and insightful it has become.
This connection to my intuition feels like a form of spiritual guidance, whether you attribute it to spirits, the divine, or God. By tapping into this innate wisdom
Lesson #10: Feeling Gratitude: The Heartfelt Thankfulness
Before my experiences with Ayahuasca, gratitude was often an intellectual exercise for me—something I knew I “should” practice for my well-being. It was a line item in a self-care checklist, often restricted to the pages of a gratitude journal. But my journey with Ayahuasca brought an entirely different dimension to this practice.
Now, gratitude is not just a thought but a deep, heartfelt emotion that resonates through me almost daily. It's a profound sense of thankfulness for the seemingly ordinary yet invaluable aspects of life—the nourishing food on my table, the air filling my lungs, and the good health that allows me to experience the world in all its richness.
Ayahuasca has taught me that gratitude is not just an act, but a state of being. One that enriches us in immeasurable ways.
Lesson #11 I Am Here To Serve: A Shift in Purpose
I used to operate from a “what's in it for me?” mindset, viewing interactions as transactions where I sought to gain. What can I get out of this situation, this relationship, this opportunity?
Ayahuasca replaced it with a sense of service and contribution. This wasn't a superficial change. The question changed from “What can I get?” to “How can I serve?” And the most incredible part of this transformation? It came without the ulterior motive of monetization or gaining some future advantage.
This change has made me feel more aligned with what I perceive as my true purpose: to serve others and grow in the process.
Recently, I had a conversation with a friend about this topic. He shared how when we want things, the body releases Cortisol, a stress hormone. However, when we think about how can we add, how can we share, how can we improve, the body releases Oxytocin, a hormone for bonding.
Lesson #12: Connection to the Divine: A Journey from Theory to Experience
My relationship with the divine, or what we might call spirituality, was only a concept to me for most of my life. Raised in a household where religion was left for me to explore and decide upon, I grew up with a theoretical belief in “something out there,” which I later referred to as the universe. Though it was a concept that existed in my mental landscape, it was never something I felt deeply connected to—until certain experiences with Ayahuasca.
Through Ayahuasca I was able to connect with the divine, the divine outside of me but also the divinity within. It wasn’t just an intellectual idea any more or a dogma to follow. It has also been another path to cultivate that relationship on a day to day level which I am still in the process.
Lesson #13 Change takes time + have the patience
In the western mentality we want everything NOW. We are conditioned to desire quick results and instant gratification. Yet, genuine transformation, especially when unlearning patterns and behaviors that have been with us for decades, doesn't adhere to this rapid timeline.
Such deep-seated patterns aren't magically undone overnight, in a week, or even over a span of 90 days. While significant strides can certainly be made within a few months, true and lasting change often requires a more extended period of reflection, work, and growth.
Interestingly, as we evolve and overcome challenges, they tend to fade from our immediate consciousness, making it easy to forget just how far we've come. It's essential to occasionally pause, look back, and appreciate the journey, recognizing the profound growth and transformation we've already achieved.
Lesson #14 Having long term goals
In today's rapidly changing world, it's easy to be swept up in the allure of quick wins and short-lived trends. The drive to seize fleeting opportunities and chase immediate gains can sometimes overshadow deeper, more enduring pursuits. In my mid twenties I was chasing the shiny object syndrome, always thinking that the other opportunity is what would generate higher earning capabilities.
However, there's profound value in looking beyond the temporary and defining long-term goals for oneself. Instead of merely asking, “How can I maximize my profits quickly?”, it has been a lot more fulfilling, “What genuinely ignites my passion? What skill or craft do I want to develop over the years? What purpose do I want to dedicate my life to?”
These questions push us to think about our legacy, about what we want to leave behind, and about the kind of impact we desire to have. By anchoring ourselves in such a long-term vision, we build a roadmap that isn't easily swayed by fleeting trends or momentary distractions.
Certain fruits you will only be able to harvest after a specific time period. You have to stay in the game for various years to be able to reap the benefits and ripple effects of your work.
Lesson #15: Cultivating Unwavering Self-Belief
The journey of personal growth and achievement is often riddled with moments of self-doubt and uncertainty. Many of us set ambitious goals for ourselves, but beneath that ambition, there's an underlying whisper of skepticism. Can I really achieve this? Am I truly capable?
While reciting affirmations in front of a mirror can be an empowering exercise, true belief in oneself goes deeper than mere words. It's an intrinsic faith, a core conviction that even if the path is d filled with unexpected detours, you possess the resilience and tenacity to navigate it.
There were moments in my life when the gap between my dreams and my reality seemed insurmountable. Despite the goals I set, there was a nagging doubt, questioning my ability to actualize my aspirations. But Ayahuasca, combined with time and experience, has gifted me with an unwavering confidence in my potential. It's no longer just a hopeful thought; it's a deeply-rooted belief.
Life may not always unfold as we anticipate, and goals might demand more time and effort than we initially imagined. But armed with genuine self-belief, the conviction that with persistence and dedication, we can realize our dreams becomes unshakable.
Lesson #16 Others suffering is not my responsibility
A crucial realization I've embraced over time is the understanding that each individual is the captain of their own ship, the master of their own destiny. Our retreat welcomes people from diverse walks of life, each grappling with unique challenges. Some arrive burdened with glaring obstacles, while others face more subtle internal battles.
While I empathize with their struggles, I've come to understand that I cannot shoulder their burdens for them. Each person's journey is shaped by a combination of conscious choices and unconscious patterns. Often, these unconscious patterns lead us into cycles of suffering, stemming from a victim mindset. However, with awareness and intention, these patterns can be recognized and transformed.
My role, as I see it, is to serve as a source of inspiration. By living my life authentically and passionately, I hope to ignite a spark in others, encouraging them to reclaim their personal power and reshape their destinies. However, change lies on their shoulders. Their choices post-retreat, their trajectory in life, are entirely their responsability.
If I were to bask in their successes or wallow in their setbacks, I would be forming attachments that could cloud my purpose and diminish my effectiveness. By respecting the autonomy of each individual and their unique path, I can remain grounded, detached, and most effective in my role as a guide and mentor.
Lesson #17 Making money is a spiritual process
Contrary to some beliefs, I've discovered that the journey of financial success is deeply connected with spiritual growth. Making money is not just about accumulating wealth; it's a transformative process that teaches us about ourselves, our worth, and the world around us.
Firstly, to go on any entrepreneurial or financial endeavor requires a level of vulnerability. You're presenting a part of yourself to the world, ready for scrutiny, rejection, or acceptance. This act of putting yourself out there is a spiritual challenge of its own, testing one's resilience, self-belief, and fortitude.
Rejections and judgments, inevitable in any venture, serve as powerful tools for introspection and growth. They teach us to detach from external validation and find worth from within. They mold resilience and a deeper understanding of oneself and one's purpose.
Moreover, the act of determining one's value in a monetary sense is a profound exercise in self-awareness. Recognizing your worth, both in terms of skills and the intrinsic value of your being, and then having the courage to demand that worth in the market is a testament to spiritual and personal growth.
At the heart of making money is problem-solving. Every product sold, every service rendered, addresses a specific need or challenge. To excel financially means to become adept at understanding and resolving these problems. This journey demands continuous learning, adaptation, and a genuine desire to contribute positively to the world.
In essence, the pursuit of financial success is a mirror, reflecting our personal and spiritual growth. It challenges us, molds us, and teaches us, making the journey as enriching as the destination.
Lesson #18 I can pass along only what i truly healed / have grown within myself
In the ocean of knowledge, books have been my ships, guiding me through uncharted waters. Yet, while they equipped me with theories and concepts, they rarely penetrated the depths of my being. It was people – real, authentic individuals – who truly helped me transform.
My encounter with the shaman who introduced me to Ayahuasca was such a turning point. He embodied of balance and harmony across different areas of life – be it finance, family, love, or health. He wasn't just preaching from books; he was living his wisdom. When he shared insights, they hit home with me not because they were new, but because they were lived truths. His authenticity gave weight to his words, making them resonate profoundly.
I've realized the difference between knowledge and wisdom. When I share book knowledge, it's understood but rarely internalized. However, when I share personal experiences – my journey to authenticity, self-love, and conquering anxiety – it touches others. These are not mere words but reflections of my growth and healing.
This understanding also fuels my commitment to personal growth. For, the more I evolve, the deeper and more meaningful impact I can have on those around me.
Lesson #19 This is only the beginning
Reflecting on the past 3+ years, my journey with Ayahuasca has been nothing short of transformative. The strides I've made, the revelations I've had, and the personal evolution I've experienced are profound. But as I stand here, looking both behind and ahead, one thing is crystal clear: this is just the beginning.
Over this time period, life has been becoming simpler and more coherent. The once turbulent waters of doubt have given way to the steady streams of trust and faith— in myself, in the journey, and in the divine guiding me. This growing sense of trust and deeper maturity has made each moment richer and every challenge more navigable.
Looking back, it's astonishing to see how different my life was even a year ago, let alone two or three. This retrospective view fills me with anticipation and excitement for what the future holds. I embrace the upcoming years and decades with an open heart, eager for the lessons, growth, and experiences they promise.
Conclusion: What Ayahuasca taught me
The path with Ayahuasca is a very intense journey. It requires patience, clarity, and unwavering commitment. While the ceremonies themselves are potent catalysts for transformation, true change manifests when one steps out of that sacred space and into the everyday world. It's in the daily moments, interactions, and choices where the real work of translating insights into action takes place.
My experiences and lessons, though personal, might resonate with some. Yet, it's important to remember that everyone's journey is unique. The teachings Ayahuasca imparts vary depending on one's life stage, challenges, and intentions. As you venture on this path, may you find your own truths, embrace your own growth, and carve out a path that aligns with your soul's calling.
FAQ: What Ayahuasca taught me:
Will I remember what Ayahuasca taught me?
You will not remember every single detail of your Ayahuasca ceremony. But you will remember the most important lessons that you experienced in your ceremony.
What are the teachings of Ayahuasca?
The teachings of Ayahuasca are very individual. What I observe is that people become more human after drinking Ayahuasca. A higher level of compassion towards others and themselves and wanting to be closer to others and valuing connection more.
How does Ayahuasca teach you?
Ayahuasca teaches you in many ways. In the ceremony, but even before the ceremony and after as well. It is an energy that is with you and will help guide you and make you aware of certain things.